Hope Is For All
According to statistics, about one billion people worldwide have some type of Special Need, and what makes this worse, is the reality that this ‘people group’ is also one of the most excluded groups in our society.
I went to a conference some years ago which focused on trying to enable church services to meet the needs of those with special needs, within their congregations. This has become a huge movement, but even here, the battle remains.
It seems the well-being of persons with disabilities is the last thing ‘other’ people want to think about. Life is busy and we all have problems. Yet, each of these persons have something to offer, in most of the different areas within our society. In the political arena, socially, the economic field, or even on the cultural stage, each person should be able to participate in whatever way they are capable.
While progress is being made, inclusion, however is still a far off dream for many with disabilities, across the world and even in some places here in the United States. Many disabled are exploited, discriminated against, marginalized, and vulnerable against their rightful place in society. They are at risk for optimal health care, rehabilitation services, social isolation, along with other circumstances which works against their personal human rights.
The International Day of Persons with Disabilities, is designed to raise awareness and promote the entitlements and welfare of those suffering with disabilities. Flyers, brochures, and other promotional material is created; presentations are given and findings are shared with governmental political offices, civil groups and others who are sensitive about their plight and have the where-with-all to make proclamations and set in motion, the mandates necessary, which will empower the people to make a difference for those who need it. Leadership and participation is vital, if changes are going to be made.
Christmas is only a few weeks away. One of the characteristics that is “Christmas”, is hope. It is important to the well-being of those within the ‘Special Need people group’, to be able to have hope. They need to know they are a value to their families, neighborhoods, communities, work places and to themselves.
It’s also the time of year when depression rises, as people miss loved ones or even feel isolated from society. Celebrations are the ‘order of the season’ and many are not invited because they are viewed as different and incapable of interacting with the required etiquette, of some of the other guests there. Sometimes the scars go so deep, they feel rejected and unworthy of living.
Hope. As we acknowledge ‘International Disability Day,’ I suggest we offer large doses of ‘hope’—- particularly Christmas Hope— that we each are a valuable member of society, regardless of our limitations and our exceptionalities! We all have the opportunity to bring our best to the manger—just as The Wise Men did centuries ago, as we accept each other as ‘perfectly’ created, with special gifts to share.
Reach out this Christmas season to those who feel forgotten and often labeled an outcast, at least in terms of social interaction. We all need to feel loved, the warmth of another person being kind, and hope, —which can be the best gifts of all.
Photo Credit: https://hopeforthebrokenhearted.wordpress.com/2016/12/25/prayer-for-dec-25th-2/
The Diabetes Journey of Children
I had a friend during middle and high school who had diabetes. I never knew it. We rode the bus to school together every day, and not once did she ever let on she wore a monitor to keep track of her diabetic numbers.
It wasn’t until we were in our late fifties, while talking about health issues, that diabetes entered the conversation. She then shared with me she wore the device as a teen, and then showed me the device she still wears. I was wowed! She seemed so brave and accepting of ‘what just is.’
But diabetes can be scary. Statistics show that 5-10% of those who have diabetes fall into the Type 1 category and are usually children, teens and young adults. The symptoms occur rapidly and require daily insulin to manage. And, sadly, knowing how to prevent Type 1 diabetes is still a mystery.
Another friend shared her story. “Finding out I had diabetes, about scared me to death,” she explained. “I was only five, and already had been told I had some kind of seizure disorder and I was allergic to gluten and dairy. My Mom had diabetes, and I just remembered her struggling. It was awful.”
Eventually once a child (or family) gets used to the fact of the illness and learning what cam be eaten, —-or not, to keep blood sugar levels stable, makes life easier.
One of the hardest parts of it for children, is having to deal with it while in school. There are misunderstandings. It’s not a contagious condition, which some believe. But seeing someone use a glucose meter in the nurse’s office, what it is and why it’s used requires explanation. It becomes a very normal part of the daily routine.
Not being able to celebrate in the classroom when someone is celebrating a birthday or on Valentine’s Day or at Christmas when there is so much sweet stuff around, is another really tough thing for some children, who feel left out, when they can’t enjoy the treats, as well!
But managing diabetes must be the focus, once a person is diagnosed with the illness. When parents understand this fact with their child, coming to grips with their new ‘normal’ is a little easier. It’s a joint effort with caregivers, to maintain balance. It doesn’t have to be debilitating, but support can be a key element in a healthy lifestyle.
Every child (or person) is unique and each deals with illnesses differently. Some respond positively like my friend from middle/high school. Others aren’t so fortunate; and that can come from a variety of circumstances.
It’s what we do with the information we have, whether or not the journey we are on will become a ‘storm’ in life, or just a ‘wave’ in the water. Knowledge is helpful, but it’s up to us to use it to the best of our ability.
Sunday November 14, 2021 was World Diabetes Day. The theme this year is “access to diabetes care.” Even after a century of knowledge about insulin, many around the world still do not have the care they need. Ongoing care, support and understanding is vital to avoiding complications.
Let’s get on board to support those with this disease, to share the information which can be a benefit to a healthy lifestyle!
Photo Credit: https://www.pexels.com/search/diabetes/
My Rainbows
The following is a guest post by Ruth Bruegger which was first published on Lillian Brummet’s website, September 30, 2020.
I hope you’ll enjoy it.
https://ezinearticles.com/expert/Lillian_Brummet/13924
My Rainbows
By Ruth Bruegger | Submitted On September 30, 2020
I kept seeing rainbows in my life. A new friend sent me a picture of a Rainbow that appeared on her wall, because of the Crystal hanging in the window. Then the next posting I saw was a picture of a Rainbow Stone. I noticed references to the rainbow was appearing in different articles that I was reading.
I believe if I keep seeing repeatedly a word or picture, I should pay attention. What did this mean to me? I wrote a children's book Count Candy Corn and I wanted to create a series about Count Candy Corn going under color.
This brings me to the present. I have been on a spiritual journey this last year. The blessings of being old enough and not being run by a clock has given me this opportunity. I was reared Christian and I do have a strong faith. I have also opened my heart to other cultures and religions. I have joined different groups. I have never seen a more significant time in my life that kindness and caring needs to return.
This is not to preach but just to share my journey. I am sure I am not the only one who views their life and looks for significance or what impact you can make before your earthly time is over. The best lessons I have had in life is stories told to me from my elders. I had the imagination to soak up and visualize their stories. They became part of my journey. The older people gave to me what my parents did not have and that was time.
What does this have to do with rainbows?
Everything from my book, my Christian Faith, my respect of other people's faith and beliefs, the multicolored people our planet has and the oneness of the world. The world is a circle and we are all the same. We as a human species have children to love and nurture. We hurt when one of our family members are taken from us. We all need water and food to live. We need to love and be loved and this is from the very young to the very old.
I am a seeker of knowledge and I share. I have had to learn I share too much sometimes. I have been told I am too deep and at times I viewed this as a flaw in me. What is wrong with me? Why do I need to share? I have been over the years not loving myself and seeking approval from other people who had their own problems and hang ups.
The realization, I have learned to forgive from my heart people who have offended me both physically and mentally. I realized that I had trouble forgiving my own human failings. This is significant if you do not forgive and love yourself how can you love others?
My journey begins again with each day. What will I learn today?
Ruth Bruegger is a published author of the books, "Count Candy Corn" and "Born-Lived-Died". Ruth and her husband Hans reside in Rockford Illinois. The website for the children's book is http://www.countcandycorn.com
Article Source: https://EzineArticles.com/expert/Ruth_Bruegger/139683
https://ezinearticles.com/?My-Rainbows&id=10361020
Photo Credit: www.google.com/search?q=free+pictures+of+being+on+a+journey+with+a+rainbow
ADHD or Something Else?
A few years back my husband and I were planning on moving to another part of the United States. As we were getting settled, I needed the attention of a new physician. Upon meeting the doctor for the first time, was the usual questions which I, of course, answered.
I’ve found over the years that when I am nervous or get excited I talk in ‘fast forward’ and I always use my hands when I talk, regardless of what speed I’m using! Not unusual, I was very nervous during the appointment—- there seems to be something about the doctor’s office that unsettles me.
After the appointment I received the normal ‘after doctor visit paperwork’ and to my surprise the doctor had put in his records, “This patient shows signs of ADHD!” As a 60+ aged woman, I laughed right out loud! It had never been suggested that I had any such issue. For me, it was all nerves! No, I certainly do not have ADHD!
While I could laugh at the doctor’s assumptions, ADHD is not a laughing matter. It’s a problem we see in children more and more often and it isn’t surprising when you consider the stressors. We (including our children!) live in a stress filled world, where busy seems to be best, with decreased sleep hours or good sleep, compounded with the enormous amount of additives that lives in our processed foods, and overstimulation, given all the video and technological devices our children (and adults) live with every single day!
Sometimes the diagnosis of ADHD forces the person onto medications to help control the manifestations that seem to overpower them. This helps enable the victim to center and focus on the task before them, and perhaps take the edge off the desire, or need to call out in a classroom, which can be annoying for a teacher, as well as, students in the room.
Medication can aid not only academically, but also in relationships. Friendships stabilize and improve so others begin to include them in events where before, because of bad (or at least a different) behavior, they were not included.
It’s always considered progress when a patient is able to either lessen the dosage or completely stop taking the medication altogether. Progress is also celebrated by both the doctor (or clinician) and the student who learns that getting organized with a planner or calendar enables them to finish their homework or other tasks that have often been challenging.
It’s interesting to note that girls tend to have different symptoms than boys. While boys are busy (hyperactive) and seemingly into ‘everything’ (impulsive) girls tend to withdraw, having very little self-confidence. Girls with ADHD often feel attacked, even by the person not intending to do so.
A teacher may accuse the student of being smart, but not taking responsibility and instead of making a positive, encouraging statement, make a remark that further debilitates the child’s efforts. This ‘silent disorder’ as some call it, needs first to be recognized, then handled with kindness and affirmation that she is smart, capable and able to succeed, no matter what else seems to be happening.
ADHD is a complicated disorder and affects children differently. Sometimes medications are required to help focus and calm. Other times a serious amount of love and affection, encouragement and affirmation are the perfect antidote. Whichever is needed, we need to remember as peers, that a child doesn’t always understand why he or she behaves like they do—- they just are and can’t help that. We need to be cognizant of the way we handle it, for both the child’s best interests, as well as, our own.
Photo credit: https://www.additudemag.com/adhd-awareness-month-2021/amp/
Choose Life With Hope
We live in a society driven by what others think and expect from us. We work hard to make ends meet and sometimes even, to do better than our neighbor. It’s all about the presentation. But this drive to succeed can be so consuming, it takes all the life out of us, especially if we aren’t succeeding in the way we think others will accept.
What I’ve described is the world of adults. Right? What if I said this is also the world of our young people, our very young people? Doesn’t seem so likely, does it? Yet it is also truth. There was a time, not that many years ago, I would never have spoken (or written) the word ‘depression’ in the same sentence with the word ‘child.’ It seemed so unlikely.
I remember when one little boy I knew was angry, very angry. At six years old he was mad at the world and went so far as to say he wanted to kill himself. How is this possible. Did he even know what he was saying. I was stunned! Yet, even with this information, I didn’t think depression. I thought only anger. I didn’t realize anger begets depression. A young person of just six who has dealt with loss, rejection, upheaval of his world, and more, has a right to be angry—-and perhaps even depressed; and it’s time we as adults, recognize it for what it is.
One girl said she knew she was having issues when she was angry all the time. She’d kick and scream and throw things, and all the while wonder who she was. She was lost in the cycle of anger, fear; and yes it took her to a dark place we define as depression.
Just like adults, our children react to their world through intense emotions. They don’t know how to deal with the way they feel. It’s scary. Even if they have a best friend, who’d believe them or understand them, if they couldn’t define it and understand it themselves?
Sometimes the depression goes on for so long, the deep hole in which they find themselves, seems overpowering. They’ve lost hope and even the desire to live. These young people who deal with bullying, loss, and rejection, are tormented to the point where they’ve lost all hope. They feel alone and believe ending it all is the only answer.
There is hope, however, but they’ve got to choose it, before any behavior which can’t be reversed, happens. We, as adults, need to recognize the signs and seek help for our youngsters through people trained to pull out the hidden hurts and anger buried deep within the surface of their minds.
It’s Depression Education Awareness Month. Have you witnessed signs of depression in a young child or youth? Christmas will be upon us in just two months. This time of year seems to intensify depression in young people, just as it does in adults. Don’t allow the joy of the season to be stolen by depression; even for a moment. Offer or seek professional help on their behalf; someone they can talk to. (Or for yourself, if needed!) Don’t let depression go untreated.
(An added note: The 6-year-old I mentioned did eventually get help and worked through his anger and pain.)
Photo Credit: https://pixabay.com/photos/man-lonely-hiding-sad-young-alone-1822414/
Celebrating Victories
Babies are amazing. Even with babies we don’t know but pass in the super market or mall, we find ourselves often stopping, to say “Hi “to or coo and fuss over, or we do our best to make them smile. Memories of our own little ones flood our senses and cause us to smile and in some small way tickle the desire to just want to hold one again; to cuddle and love on these precious little ones so dependent on our care.
Even teen girls are quick to pick up a little one. I’ve seen many approach a new momma and ask if they could hold the little one, just for a few moments. In fact, some will even ask if they can cuddle the little one even through an entire church service! These little ones just have a way of endearing themselves just because they are small, radiate tenderness and are willing to cuddle; something most all people appreciate!
There was one such little one in our church congregations years ago, but she was extra special. She was a Down Syndrome baby. As she grew into her childhood, people continued to adore her. She was quick to hug and smile, and it seemed she always found something nice to say to whomever stopped to chat.
As the grew into a young woman, her character never changed. She radiated warmth, enjoyed life, was loving and filled with joy, but realized she did not need to be the center of attention. She remembered to ask how you were and about your week. She was a happy child who loved people.
She is not unique to the Down Syndrome world. Ask most any parent with a Down Syndrome baby and they will tell you the same thing. My little friend from church’s momma used to always say, “She has taught me so much.”
It is Down Syndrome awareness month and I wonder how much those of us who do not have such a special child really know about their world. The genetic condition is often, but not always, accompanied with heart issues, sometimes requiring surgery, as well as, other medical problems. It affects both physical and mental growth, and it’s usually easy to identify their disability by the differences in facial structure. Additionally, the degree of disability does affect their level of cognitive and functioning abilities.
But this is not what Down Syndrome children want you to know and understand. More importantly than their differences, is their desire to be treated like every other child on the planet who has dreams, ideas and the ability to carry them out.
There are success stories! One young girl started her own business selling dog treats based on her love of animals. Another was invited to a New York City art exhibition featuring her paintings! Still another was on her way to college to become a dance teacher, and another had her sights set on the Miss America pageant after winning at the county and state level pageants, and there are many, many more who have started their own business or succeeded in other ways.
These are children who deserve the chance to try! Their drive isn’t just for personal accomplishment, but to show the world they are worthy of the calling and innate gifting, God enabled them to deliver. We, as their peers should cheer them on and join them as the celebrate each step up the victory ladder!
#DownSyndromeAwarenessMonth #DownSyndromeVictories #SpecialNeeds#GiftedChildren #DownSyndromeBusinesses #BabiesAreAmazing #BabiesOfferBlessings
Crossing The Line To Cruelty
“Kids will be kids,” I remember hearing this when I was younger; but I refuse believe children are naturally cruel. I don’t know whether the behavior is learned or it’s just become part of our ‘modern’ culture to be mean to another person— and here I’m not just talking about kids!
I remember as an elementary student being teased and taunted for being different. My parents moved around a lot and I spent each of my first six years of school in at least one different school. It set my sister and I up for low self-esteem and a level of shyness, that for my sister, was nearly debilitating! It seemed we’d no sooner finally get settled in and we’d move again and have to start all over; meeting new teachers and trying to make new friends. It was a tough time, and I wasn’t even in middle school yet!
Middle schoolers face an even greater threat of bullying, now more than ever. Our society is littered with music filled with hate and often social media platforms which crosses the line of what can be said and shared. Sadly children are sometimes bullied to the point they air their own suicides on line.
To make this even worse, this is the age where our ‘tweens’ seem to shut us out, as parents. They face their trial alone, certain they can handle it, or worse, afraid that should they speak out, the repercussions would be even greater. Our once adorably, cuddly, chatty children are in hiding to everyone, but their peers.
It creates fear, anxiety and tension not only in the child, but also in the parents. We’re wondering what went wrong. How can we help? Why won’t my child talk to me? What did we do to lose their trust? Along with a thousand other questions. Still they say, “Kids will be kids. They’ll work it out.” What happens if they don’t? Bullying seems to beget bullying and it seems no one is safe. And with the existence and accessibility of the internet, the cruelty is ramped up another notch or two. It’s all about being in the right ‘social position’ with just the right ‘friends.’
I’d like to take this idea just a step further, however. No child should ever be bullied. But there is one victim who is even more vulnerable that the “average child who gets bullied!” The Special Needs child is a target at far greater risk. A child with special needs is usually less likely to stand up to his tormentors than even the most shy child. He didn’t choose to not be able to run as fast, or not talk as eloquently as his peers. He didn’t choose to wear a given birth mark, or have Down Syndrome, arthritis, epilepsy, dyslexia, ADHD or autism, cancer or fifty other “special needs” common to our children. Yet these “needs” define him!
And sadly, our society doesn’t always stand up to those who bully. Peers of ‘said bullying,’ are afraid to step in, because they could be the next victim. Rules are in place, but are hard to enforce if the ‘right person’ isn’t a witness. It’s a complicated (and often convoluted system) and it’s time we, as parents, friends, neighbors, and advocates of Special Needs children, to join hearts and hands, abilities and determination to stamp out this cruelty, called ‘bullying.’ Words hurt, and can leave lifetime scars. I hope you’ll attempt to learn more about this, during this month designated “Bullying Awareness Month. It’s time bullying no longer frightened, intimidated, or threatened any child. Let’s make it happen!
#BullyingAwarenessMonth #TimeToStopBullying #BeAnAdvocate #KidsWillBeKids #BullyingIsCruelty
Photo Credit: http://clipart-library.com/clipart/rijkB5BiR.htm
Arthritis Isn’t For Kids!
When our second born entered fourth grade, we discovered an unusual problem, and it often happened while she was at school. For no apparent reason she would turn bright red on her knuckles, knees and of all places, her ears— and it was hot to the touch! It was beyond frustrating since the episodes would only last for two to five, sometimes ten minutes, and then go away. She didn’t feel horribly sick, although it made her feel weak.
Of course we didn’t have iPhones back then so I could take a picture, so describing this to a doctor was beyond difficult! (And we didn’t have a Polaroid one either!) For a while the doctors thought she had Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis. Eventually the episodes did stop, and whatever she had was not confirmed—or completely identified, since JRA symptoms can disappear in children. (Statistically, it is believed that half of children affected with this disorder, outgrow it.)
Fast forward almost thirty years later to her third born, who does have confirmed Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis. Her daughter doesn’t have the same intense redness her momma did, (although there is some) but she too, becomes weak, gets a headache and is completely fatigued, especially when bad weather is moving in. Knowing my grand daughter has JRA, and even though our daughter was never ‘officially’ diagnosed with JRA, it causes me pause.
I admit, before the doctor suggested my daughter had any chance of having JRA, I was clueless. I always believed arthritis wasn’t for children. It was all about getting older with the weather changes being ‘felt in our bones’!
Most of us know what arthritis is, but we think of it, in terms of ‘seniors’. Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis is an autoimmune disease, that attacks a child’s immune system. The inflammation and stiffness affecting the joints can be very painful.
Additionally, there is information which explains it can also attack organs like the heart or lungs. There are many factors involved in this condition, including, (but not limited to) genetic and environmental. Research continues, as does awareness about the disorder.
Awareness is important not only to the victims of the disease, but for the general public. As an ‘invisible disease’ it can stay hidden from other people for many years, while the victim suffers quietly. This is one of those situations where sadly, as onlookers, we may question any disability placard or other insignia displayed.
Compounding daily pain and discomfort, the pain shifts and can be heightened from day to day. As I watch my young grand daughter, it’s heartbreaking to see this busy, industrious little girl curled up on the couch, while her siblings are outside playing. Sometimes, because a weather system has not yet moved in, we are confused by her behavior, since she almost never complains. Then when we think it through, we have an ‘a-ha’ moment!
Making a child comfortable during flare ups of this disorder is important. One of those ways is making sure they have prescribed medicine to help ease the pain; make sure they are exercising and eating right, which can be challenging when a child feels bad. Add to this our love, and a huge dose of compassion and understanding.
Photo Credit: https://www.google.com/search?q=pictures+of+JRA+in+knees&client=safari&channel=iphone_bm&biw=1437&bih=749&sxsrf=AOaemvK31vxmNlu-
The Gift Of Sign Language
When I was in high school, if you took the ‘college prep’ track, then taking a foreign language, like Spanish or French, was required. It terrified me! I was delighted when I discovered the ‘business track’, which I wanted, since I was certain our family could not afford college anyway, did not require this. Imagine my surprise when many years later I discovered that American Sign Language is also considered a foreign language!
Now, one of my grand daughters is studying Spanish and her nine-month old sister is learning ‘Sign’! No, she doesn’t have a hearing problem, but it’s a wonderful skill to have. While the baby is learning this ‘foreign language’, so is the rest of the family. I have to chuckle when even the dog responds to ‘Sign’!
I remember watching a movie several years ago where a couple was eating in a restaurant. While they were eating, two men came in and the waitress was getting their order. I’m not sure who was more frustrated—-the waitress or the man trying to give the order.
The young woman at the other table saw the situation and told the waitress what the man was trying to say. The guy with her was astounded! “How do you know Sign language?” he asked. “My dad was unable to speak,” she answered, “so we all knew Sign language to be able to communicate. It’s how I grew up.”
Those images and conversation have stayed with me, and I’ve since wanted very much, to learn Sign language. Anyone who knows me will tell you, I’m a chatter, and I do much of it with my hands, even though I am completely capable to use my voice! Even though I tend to accentuate what I say with my hands, and use a great many facial expressions, should I meet someone who really needs this skill, I would not be able to communicate! That thought gives me pause.
I can’t imagine not hearing the birds sing in the early morning, breakfast sizzling in the skillet, my grandchildren talking all at once, the sound of the ‘belly laugh’, Gospel music, crickets, wind blowing through the pine trees, rain hitting a tin roof and the list could go on forever. Hearing is what brings the world to our senses. We can hear ‘it’ even when we don’t have a visual!
Our world is filled with people who are either somewhat hearing impaired or have total hearing loss. I am awed when I watch people who ‘Sign’ during a music presentation or during conventions when many people are attending. It makes me wonder how many in attendance need this added benefit to be able to ‘hear’ what is being said.
I just read a post from my hearing impaired friend in SD that a police department in Kaysville, UT is learning sign language. This is how important knowing how to communicate is. I agree with her, “This should be everywhere!” she commented.
September 23 is International Day of Sign Languages; and it’s interesting to note that many countries have their own specific ‘Sign’. It is believed that there are between 140 and 300 unique sign languages world wide. Apparently different areas have specific nuances much like different areas around the US have their own dialects and even slang, cultural words and expressions.
Learning sign language is so important, even if a person can speak well! What a great way to make yourself available to those who can’t speak aloud! I challenge you to consider learning a foreign language: the language of ‘Sign’!
Children Deserve To Live
Our world is in the middle of a huge battle with the Coronavirus. The statistics are staggering on the number of people affected by the virus, whether a person is vaccinated or not. As the germ mutates, even children are being negatively impacted. It’s affected all areas of our lives.
There’s another ‘germ’ in our midst that from a childhood perspective, sometimes get a little overlooked. Childhood Cancer. Statistics indicate it has become the number one killer of children by disease. The information regarding this monster beast, like the Coronavirus, is also astounding. It is estimated that over 15,000 children, from birth to age 19 are diagnosed with Cancer every year in the US. Of this number about 20% of these children will not survive. I have a hard time even processing this information!
I had five children and can’t imagine the trauma that must come with the news that my little person could have such a mountain to climb. While I never experienced this grief, I mourn for all those lost and for all the families who face this trial, every single year.
There are varied opinions why our little people are deluged with this kind of viper. While some will tell you diet plays a large role in the cell breakdown of children, others claim it’s our environment, given all the pesticides used on plants, and toxins found in our homes.
It is possible diet may play a role during pregnancy. It’s common knowledge (although often ignored) that eating lots of red or processed meat is not good for you, given the hormone, synthetic additives and salt hidden within. We know that junk food and sugar all are best left alone, when we consider all the chemicals found in their pretty little packages, which has the ability to tantalize our taste buds. All these factors affect a child being carried within the womb.
Others will tell you, however, like St. Jude research hospital that nearly 10% of these children inherited a genetic mutation. Read (https://www.stjude.org/get-involved/other-ways/childhood-cancer-awareness-month.html#statistics) for the full article.
Regardless of how a child develops cancer, they and their families suffer. They endure pain, fear, medical therapies and expenses among other trials, during their journey, in an attempt to recover. Even when recovery comes, however, it isn’t the end of the process. Most will have residual problems the rest of their lives, creating days when they are in agony, due to the manifestation of the cruelty their body has endured.
One teenaged survivor shared how she was bullied after her recovery. Her peers believed she was faking the issues she was having in school. This is horrific! No one wants to feel this bad! All children want and deserve the right to live happy and productive lives.
Cancer has a way of hiding from an outsider’s eyes. It causes pain and discomfort in ways a victim hadn’t expected, even after the ‘disease’ is officially no longer in their body. There are long time effects that can’t be seen by anyone—- but hauntingly real to the one still fighting to stay on top!
Disabilities come in many forms and sometimes it’s an invisible disability. As onlookers, we need to be cognizant of the person who parks in handicapped parking even when to our inexperienced eyes, we don’t see the problem they are facing. I know there are those who will abuse the use of the handicap placard, but I’d like to think that compassion is more often honored, even when we can’t see the disability.
#ChildhoodCancerAwareness #ChildhoodCancer #ChildrenDeserveToLive #CancerKillerOfChildren #InvisibleDisability #LifelongMedicalProblems #CancerStealsOurChildren
Therapy Animals Improving the Quality of Life
Our family has two pets, a white German Shepherd, Tatanka, we call the ‘great white beast’ because he’s over 110 pounds, but is protector of the property and his charges, our grandchildren who live next door. We also have a very timid and flighty inside cat.
We bought Tatanka from a private seller who had taught him a lot of bad manners and habits which needed changing once we adopted him a just over a year old. Little Bear, our cat, we adopted from the SPCA who’d spent nearly the first six months of his life in a cage and had no idea how to respond as a normal cat. While he is much more social now, he still hides when company comes in, and jumps at the drop of a hat!
Neither of our animals are considered ‘therapy animals’ but in our family, both the cat and the dog are loyal to my husband, who has been sick for some time. The cat will curl up next to my husband almost as soon as he sits in the recliner. The dog follows him everywhere when they are outside! Given my husband’s health, the cat offers calm since my husband will stroke his back without even thinking and the dog lets us know where we can find his master!
Animals are amazing creatures, and not just cats and dogs, although they are the ones most people consider the best for therapy. Other animals, such as, alpacas, Vietnamese Pot Bellied pigs, birds, cows, horses and other animals can serve the same purpose.
When trained correctly, these amazing animals can offer love, support, and other kinds of therapies for their masters. One dog I read about was rescued after being badly burned. The vet, to whom the dog was given, discovered the dogs unique qualities, personality and nature that now, after training, can offer therapy to humans who have been burned.
I love the stories about soldiers who have a dog assigned to them that stays by their side through all elements of their duty. What’s amazing is when one of these dogs saves his owner from certain death because of a heroic act of bravery.
Some cats apparently have the uncanny ability to sense when a person is dying and have been known to curl up on the bed in a nursing home with a person nearing his end on earth; staying until the person is called home.
Not all animals can become therapy animals, but even untrained pets who offer joy, comfort and love, can offer incredible quality of life to an elderly person all alone, a child facing a debilitating disease, a disabled person who needs the added element of an animal close by, whether it be for a sight disability or a person who needs emotional support due to PTSD caused by trauma from being in the battle field, or another kind of trauma induced need.
Studies have shown that an animal need not be a pure bred to be worthy of being a therapy candidate. It seems those animals who faced intense cruelty or otherwise injured in their own right, have the unique qualities required for becoming the perfect partner for someone in need.
I am no animal trainer, and I laud those who have the ability to create the needed habits and mannerisms to make them certified therapy animals. Perhaps you can see your own pet as adding a unique quality of life to your family.
Or perhaps you are a person who may need a therapy animal. There are organizations who handle this and may even help you get YOUR pet trained. One, of many good places to start might be: https://medicalmutts.org/how-to-get-a-service-dog/ , the ASPCA or even the Humane Society. It can’t hurt to inquire, if you are in need.
#DogAppreciationDay #AnimalAppreciationDay #AnimalsAndDisabilites #TherapyAnimals #AnimalsForComfort #AnimalsForKidsWithDisabilities #CertifyPetsForTherapy #RescueAnimalsForTherapy #ImprovedQualityOfLife
Mosquitoes In The Great Outdoors
“There’s a mosquito flying around my head and I can’t get it,” complained my husband. “You’ve got to find it.”
“Seriously?” I whined. “It’s not bothering me!”
“You’ve got to get it so I can sleep,” he maintained. So I rose from my sleepiness in the middle of the night, flicked on the light, stood on the bed near the brightness and tried to find the little beastie!
Yes! This actually happened more than once in the early years of our marriage! He, I reasoned, was the one who really had to sleep in order to be able to get up for work the next morning. It mattered not that he woke me from my sleep, or that I had a baby to tend to during the day! I’d be able to find a moment later in the day, hopefully, to nap.
Mosquitos are what seem like fickle little creatures that can bite a body to pieces in a matter of moments. Even while in the same ‘space,’ with my husband, he seemed to be one of those whose body scent attracted them. When that female mosquito would light on his body, she’d pierce his skin, lubricate his flesh with her saliva, and suck his blood out.
These actions would enable her to produce the eggs she would lay, that would create more of these tiny flying critters! I’m not sure at the time I realized the importance of protecting ourselves from these bites. Certainly, no one likes being stung or bitten by anything. It brings swelling, itching and sometimes even pain.
But these little varmints can be downright deadly! Sir Ronald Ross discovered the females can transmit malaria in 1897. They are also responsible for the West Nile Fever, Yellow Fever and more! And, it takes a single bite of an infected mosquito to cause an infection.
Because of this discovery, World Mosquito Day (August 20) was initiated to educate and bring awareness to people across the globe of the poison these little brutes can carry. The day was created to let people know the importance of keeping yards free of standing water; including that which can be beneath leaves and other debris left in gutters, standing pails or even bird baths and water left for outside pets.
In addition to removing standing water, a favorite place to lay eggs; mosquitos also like grass clipping, raked leaves, compost piles or even thick vegetation of any kind in which to hide if there is any moisture within. The vegetation is also protection from any breeze, since they find it difficult to fly when there is any wind motion.
Thankfully there hasn’t been many reported cases of mosquito borne diseases here in America, for some years. Yet there is about 50% of the world where information is lacking about the risk for outbreaks. According to some documentation, there have been four cases of malaria transmission since 2000 here in the United States. But there is concern that the risk is rising due to international travel and our lack of preparedness, should an outbreak occur.
I encourage you, while enjoying the ‘great outdoors’, beware of the dangers of mosquitoes insomuch as you can, around your personal space, and dress appropriately when entering an area likely filled with mosquitoes. The last thing any of us need is one more ‘virus’ to turn our world upside down!
#WorldMosquitoDay #WearLightClothing #Malaria #StandingWaterAndDebris #WestNileFever #FemaleMosquitosSpreadDisease #RisksRisingForAnOutbreak #TheGreatOutdoors
Photo Credit: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/837247386979572716/
‘Leftie’ And Happy
Photo credit https://www.istockphoto.com/search/2/image?phrase=left%20handed%20writing
We celebrate ‘Lefthanders Day” on August 13 while living in a right handed world. Somewhere between 10% and 13% of the world population is left handed, including my left handed daughter married to her left handed husband, who have at least one left handed child. (They have another baby with yet undetermined hand dominance.)
I also have a ‘should have been’ left handed sister. My parents, who thought being left handed came from Satan, disciplined my sister until she learned to use her right hand.
My parents aren’t unique to the idea of left handedness being a bad thing! This perception of wickedness is long embedded in history. “Sinister” is derived from the Latin word “sinestra” or “left.” Through the years left handed individuals have been tormented, even persecuted for their innate ability to write differently from what was considered socially normal. Even into the late 1800’s, left handed dominate people were believed to ‘be in alliance’ with the devil!
Even now, our society connects ‘left’ with negativity. In a dance a person may say, “I have two left feet,” while it’s good to be “a right hand man.” Some suggest if both a right handed and left handed person see the same images in a list and are asked to choose between the two, the right handed person is more likely to choose the items on the right, the left handed person, those images on the left; and this can, in theory, supposedly, even affect voting ballots.
In our ‘right handed world’ my microwave, refrigerator, and other appliances work from the right; including the placement of my dishwasher to the ‘right’ of the sink! Desk drawers are typically on the right and scissors and often complex machines in industry are made for ‘righties’, as well.
Some have argued that being left hand dominate, should be considered a disability. My daughter would argue (loudly) that it isn’t! It does require some adaptation, but certainly doesn’t usually inhibit a person from performing tasks or deplete the quality of life. Still it is an inconvenience, which is why people are trying to create awareness of the unique struggles created in our ‘right handed’ world, even if unintentional.
Because of this, in 1990 a Left Handers Club was created to bring awareness to manufactures and others who could have an impact on making subtle changes in new merchandise that would work better for ‘Lefties.’ This eventually led to Left Handers Day in 1992; a day to celebrate their difference and continue to educate others.
While some believe hand dominance may be genetic, Scientists are still not absolutely certain why one child is born left handed, while another right. It’s interesting to note, however, that while a person is dominantly left handed, some have the ability to use their right hand just as well, albeit for different activities. My left handed daughter catches ball with her right hand and even ties a bow right handed.
Being left handed is not a bad thing. It’s another area of being the same but being different! We are each unique and wonderfully made, even when we don’t fit all the ‘normal parameters’ set by social sectors.
To all ‘Lefties’ —- enjoy your day and celebrate!
#LeftHandednessDay #LeftHandedAndHappy #LeftHanded #RightHandedWorld #Genetics #NotWickedOrEvil #JustDifferent
Disability or Learning Difference
Words and labels. Is it a disability or learning difference? It’s all in perspective, yet it’s important for diagnosis, in order to receive aid if warranted. Still, the ‘label’ isn’t necessarily what we want to hear in a discussion in the classroom or among our peers. It seems much kinder to use the word ‘different’. After all, we are none the same. We are each unique and that’s just as it should be.
Not only are we all different, we all learn differently. Certainly there are categories in which we may fit, but even within the categories, each person, each child learns at his own pace, from whatever angle his mind sees the subject, and even dependent on what else his body is doing at the time!
Babies have a time line of ‘growing.’ Some babies will roll as early as four months, and by six months, can roll from side to side. My grand daughter at eight months still does not roll. That said, she sits up strong and steady, has seven teeth, kicks her feet to ‘swim’ in her floaty in the pool and has an amazing personality. Her body has been very busy doing other things. She will roll when she’s ready!
Albert Einstein didn’t speak until he was four and waited to read until he turned seven, but eventually caught up and then surpassed all expectations! Children learn differently. But this, in their peer group, puts them in a different category! When a child doesn’t ‘adhere’ to the normal scale, they are often considered stupid, lazy or just incapable of learning! None of that is true! Their brains are just on a different timeline, or look at the world a little different.
Imagine a classroom where a student is sitting with earphones on to help him decipher the words in the book he’s reading. He has dyslexia; a medical diagnosis which allots him the aid of audio books, legally. It’s how he learns and it’s good!
Another student one room over, is writing feverishly to get all the steps down to the Math problems. She couldn’t skip steps. She’d always come up with the wrong answer, and the teacher always seemed to skip steps when she did practice problems on the board. It was so confusing, but the teacher just assumed everyone could get it; just see it; know that it’s what you’re supposed to do, and come up with the answer.
I could easily be that little girl. Neither the math student described, nor I, have a medical diagnosis, but like the child in the classroom, Math had the ability to create great anxiety in me. I’d do all the practice problems, homework and study. Still on test day, I’d look at the pages of math problems before me and then at the clock. I couldn’t skip steps. It’d take me longer. A degree of paralyzing fear would grip me before I even started!
According to statistics one in five people in America struggle on some level with ‘natural genetic wiring’ that makes it difficult to read, do math, organize material, connect ideas, stay focused, hear and understand verbal instruction, process specific sounds, or even have the ability to just sit still for any length of time.
For each of us who struggle with any of these, or a hundred other emotional, social or academic battles, we are left feeling frustrated because we don’t ‘fit’ in the given social parameters of what is normal, or in the time line the world expects.
We all have different adaptive and coping skills. It’s important to remember this about ourselves; and also our peers, no matter where we might see them, be it on the street, in a conference room, or in a classroom.
Photo Credit: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/685602743275876274/
#differences #disability #SameYetDifferent #BrainsWorkDifferent #AdaptiveSkills #CopingSkills #NaturalGenticWiring
#SocialParameters #WordsAndLabels #Labels
Clean Water For Life
Hepatitis and water; two words that can be a horror story for a victim infected with bacteria found in unsafe water. Tomorrow, July 28, 2021 is World Hepatitis Awareness Day and it’s important to know why.
There are a variety of Hepatitis types (from A-E). This virus, regardless of type, can cause immense damage to a person’s liver, a vital organ that sustains life. In some instances, the situation can become so dire, it can cause an epidemic that causes hundreds of deaths.
Some types of Hepatitis infectious are transmitted through blood and body fluids, or infected through drug use from a contaminated needle, alcohol abuse, an autoimmune disorder, even sharing a razor, if the person using the razor first, has Hepatitis. These types of viruses become chronic illnesses with severely damaged liver problems and more. While I’m not going to go into all the details about each of the types of Hepatitis, I am going to discuss how water can be a key player in the Hepatitis puzzle.
Organisms of all description lives in water and are totally harmless. It’s a natural phenomenon. But sometimes our drinking water gets contaminated with other bacteria like arsenic, E.coli, lead, radon and more. This is when water becomes a problem.
What’s interesting to note is this contamination isn’t resigned to only impoverished countries. It happens right here in the United States. Even as recently as March 2021, Nevada sent out an alert because people were getting sick; it was believed from bad water. Apparently the alkaline pH level had risen higher than the safe number defined as ‘7’ and people were becoming ill with Hepatitis. https://www.cdc.gov/nceh/hsb/chemicals/nonviralhepatitis.htm
Hepatitis can attack the liver violently and make a person sick for months. That is why it is so important that we not only make sure we are drinking safe water, but that children around the world are able to drink this clean, clear liquid. In some countries the water is contaminated, not only from natural causes but from unsanitary situations. In this setting, an entire community can become diseased with symptoms that can last for months! The sickness leads to the inability to think, function, and in some cases cause death, especially for small children or older adults.
While natural disasters like fires, hurricanes, tornadoes and floods can quickly cause contamination of rivers and streams due to waters mixing in with livestock excrement, human waste and other chemicals; trash disposed in the wrong places also have an impact. Household trash, plastic items, car parts, and other larger items can be found in lakes and streams across the land. These items are contaminates deposited in the water and are not only poison to humans but wildlife. The animals ingest their ‘find’ causing organ failure, and death, followed by decay. It becomes a vicious cycle, but not only for wild creatures. The contaminated waters follow the tributaries and could eventually end up in our drinking glass.
I encourage you to look at the glassful of water you hold in your hand. If you are secure in the knowledge the water is clean and free of damaging chemicals or germs, be thankful. There are plenty of folks around the globe who don’t have this precious gift, for personal sanitary needs or even sustainable to drink, for life.
#Hepatitis #WorldHepatitisAwarenessDay #CleanWater #ContaminatedWater #LiverDisease #HepatitisVirus #Disability #Health
Hugs For Health
#hugs #health #happy #family #hug your kids #relationships
Anyone who knows me, knows I’m a ‘hugger.’ It doesn’t matter if I saw you last week or last year, it’s completely normal for me to give you a hug either when I come or go. (Obviously not in the business world! Here a handshake is completely adequate.) I can’t explain it, but there is something profoundly wonderful about giving or receiving a hug.
Once when we were traveling some years ago, I met an elderly woman in the ladies room, and after a brief conversation, before leaving, spontaneously gave her a hug.
Another time there was an auto accident. I didn’t know those involved, but it was a teen-aged driver, who was thankfully unharmed, but certainly shaken. The woman who I assumed to be the mom of the teen was there, in apparent distress, looking like she could cry at any moment. Waiting for the emergency equipment to finish their work seemed to take unbearably long. On a total whim, I walked up to this woman (whom I’ve never seen again) and gave her a hug.
Does giving a spontaneous hug matter? We know hugging those we care about does. There is evidence that hugging—at least human touch, is required for survival. Some would even say we need twelve hugs a day for positive growth!
The action can make our day brighter and happier as a ‘hug’ sets off a reaction from a hormone in the pituitary gland that provides wellness attributes, that we all need, to sustain a healthy lifestyle, both emotionally and physically.
Even knowing how important hugs are to our well-being, statistics suggest up to one-third of all people are deprived of ‘touch’ and this includes children.
I remember twin babies born years ago who were separated because one of the little ones was having breathing issues. She wasn’t getting better, and a nurse decided to do something unheard of at the time and placed her little twin sister next to her in the incubator. The stronger twin managed to wrap her own tiny arm around her sibling and her twin’s heart rate immediately improved. This was a historic event in medicine! The human touch is vital to living! (Check out the YouTube story! It’ll warm your heart!)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0YwT_Gx49os
Our children, learn new things everyday. They are sometimes afraid, have questions about their world and what is going on around them, including within the confines of their family. It’s so important to remember, as parents, that we recognize our children are as much in need of hugs as we adults are. We don’t think twice about hugging our spouse, and we need to be cognizant of the fact that our little people need those hugs just as much! It strengthens the bonds of relationships, gives comfort and encouragement and releases the hormone, oxytocin.
This idea is so important, “Cuddle Therapy” has been initiated. While research isn’t suggesting hugging (or cuddling) with a stranger—- like the hug I’ve given at least twice to perfect strangers—- cuddling an animal is also a means for beneficial touch, even though that isn’t human. While human to human touch is preferred, caressing, or cuddling with a pet can also be beneficial to relieving stress and anxiety.
Give hugs, accept hugs and hug your little ones (and teens!). Help them grow into confident, compassionate, loving, happier people, while adding to your own happiness and contentment.
#hugs #happy #FamilyRelationships #children #heal #calm #HugYourKids #CuddleTherapy #AlternativeHealth
The Light Came On
Ideas and epiphanies- putting the puzzle pieces together
I was next in line for the classroom, third grade spelling bee. Excited, I stepped up and waited for the teacher to give me the word. I was ready. “Vacation,” she said. “Vacation.”
Thinking, trying to sort my thoughts and remain calm I slowly answered. “Va-ca-shon,” I said, but could feel a knot in the bottom of my stomach, knowing I’d messed it up.
“I’m sorry,” that is incorrect. Fully defeated and stricken, I went to my desk, swallowing hard, trying not to cry. Pulling out my dictionary, I looked up the word even before the next person spelled the word. Va-ca-tion, Singing the letters in my mind, I wanted to run back up to the teacher and say, “I’ve got it! I’ve got it!” Of course that was impossible, but that sing-song voice I heard when I discovered how to spell that word, has never left my mind. It’s as clear now as it was over fifty years ago. It’s caused me to be a person who is not “OCD” about spelling words right, but it set the stage for writing that would last a lifetime!
While my epiphany wasn’t anything grand, there are those throughout history who really did have impressive epiphanies that made a difference in many lives! Consider Sir Isaac Newton who observed the apple dropping from the tree that was catalyst for formulating the Universal Law of Gravitation.1
Another “thinker” includes a stem cell biologist, Lorenz Studer who studies human stem cells due to a bone infection he had as a teenager. While attending college, he met another student who shared his interest and the radical idea of replacing damaged cells was an epiphany that has had a long term effect on people dealing with Parkinson’s Disease.2
Barbara McClintock is yet another person who had an epiphany in the area of genetics. She was sure she was looking in the microscope wrong, but after time away from the problem, returned and saw the chromosomes completely different. That revelation was to impact genetics from that time on.3
We’ve all been given minds to think. While we may not be geniuses or possess the ability to develop something grand in the scientific field like Newton, Studer or McClintock, we do have the ability to use our imagination to make our lives have purpose. We can use our minds to organize our days to be more productive, take classes that will improve our skills in our chosen field, or teach others the information we do have, and just have the sheer determination to allow information that travels through our minds worthwhile, or even give us that “Aha moment” when we figure out something awesome.
Having an epiphany is grand and it usually “sticks” with you, but even if you can’t recall any “real epiphany” every one of us has had a time when something just clicked inside our heads! Reflect on your life to see if you can recall any of those “Aha moments,” ---that moment when “the light came on!” How old were you? Was it a catalyst for something later in life? Did it change your way of thinking? Did it cause you to move in a different direction than you expected? I challenge you to use your epiphany do something creative and unusual, make a difference in someone else’s life or make a positive change in your own.
1https://opinionatedmiscellany.wordpress.com/2012/10/16/epiphanies-revelations-and-other-childhood-trauma/ 2https://www.mskcc.org/research-advantage/meet-researchers/lorenz-studer-work
3https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barbara_McClintock
Are We Still The Land of The Free?
We just celebrated Independence Day in the United States. It’s been 234 years. Some would say that’s a long time. I guess it depends on what it’s compared to. Compared to the age of the Earth, not so much. Compared to the age of a human however, it’s a lot! It’s so much, in fact, no one can say they’ve been alive that long, so there is no direct memory of what happened July 4, 1787. But we have records many people kept, because they wanted other people to know and understand what happened when they were alive. It is the manner in which history is remembered; even family history, about parents, grandparents and great grandparents.
There is a huge thrust in our society today to search ancestral history. Sites thrive which promise a connection with our past. It’s important because people want to be linked with those who came before, who helped genetically create, the person they have become.
But in July 1787 a time had come in our Nation’s history that demanded change. It was a time when the leaders and people of this brand new land wanted to create something that framed the way people thought, along with a basic set of ground rules for everyone to live by. So people like George Washington, Ben Franklin, James Madison, and Alexander Hamilton joined forces, intellect and voices to create the document we now claim as the highest law in the United States: The US Constitution.
While no plan is perfect, and certainly the group of men gathered had to compromise on some issues, it did provide the framework of the law of the land, we adhere to, even now. That said, while the Constitution did provide the boundaries for the government over all, each state also has a Constitution and has the ability to create laws which are not necessarily included in the U.S. Constitution. This was part of the reason our country was involved in a great Civil War back in the 1860’s. There were those who believed their state’s rights were being violated.
What of today? There are those who believe our states rights—and even personal rights— are again being violated as laws are passed which not all states want to be part. At what point, do we as citizens, say, “I don’t think so!”? If we feel strongly about something, shouldn’t we voice those opinions? According to the Constitution’s First Amendment, through the Bill of Rights, we have the right to express our feelings without fear of harm. This is a wonderful freedom, yet as tensions throughout our country continue to simmer, and even near the boiling point in some areas, it doesn’t always feel safe to voice an unpopular opinion.
Are we still the “Land of the Free?” Are we still the great nation soldiers fought and died for through the years? The Constitution wasn’t a free deal. It came with a price. It cost the lives of many men on many sides. And it didn’t stop there as people became discontent with the government those years just before the Civil War. People became angry and took sides. Are we headed down that same road again?
I challenge you to take a good look at this great United States. Are you still “proud to be an American?” I hope so, but I wonder if there are those who would disagree.
It’s In The DNA
My friend recently completed a book on her family history. It’s fascinating to see the documents about her family and read about the lives they led.
On the maternal side of my family ‘the tree’ is researched back to the 1200’s, but I don’t have documents, pictures or any real written history of my family from there. On my father’s side, there is the family tree that isn’t nearly so far reaching, but a book about, at least part, of the family history.
It’s fascinating to see pictures of family and how often one person in the family just kind of looks a bit different! My sister’s children, like mine have dark hair, brown eyes, with medium skin tone. But right in the middle of my sister’s family is one child who has blonde hair, blue eyes and more fair skinned than his siblings! Jokingly, of course there are the comments, “he’s the milkman’s,” but in reality when searching down through the lineage, you’re going to find several generation back, was a blonde haired, blue eyed relative!
Of course, it has to do with DNA and genetic principles which mostly escape me, but I understand that each of us is unique with a long stretch of DNA that comes from both sides of the family, and through many generations! Is it any wonder there is the occasional child who picks up those genes to remind us of lives long past?
I remember a show many years ago where one daughter came across a picture of a great aunt she’d never met. The first thought was it was a picture of herself, but clearly the date of the picture confirmed it was not her! The aunt, as it happened, was planning a visit to her nephew she hadn’t seen in many years. Excitement reverberated through the house hold about the visit. Sure enough, the aunt arrived and the young girl, who was quite beautiful, met the woman who she mirrored visually, when the woman was much younger. Her heart sank when she opened the door. The woman was not at all what she expected. Her once blonde hair was now red and kinky and totally what she did not want to look like as a sixty-year-old woman!
What she learned, however during the visit, was there was more to a person than just their looks. The great aunt had been around the world, met kings and queens, all kinds of dignitaries, received gifts from princes and a whole host of other benefits from people she met along the way. Her personality and character endeared her to all she met. The young girl finally realized it’s not about how we look that matters! The important part of life is being “who we are” with character, values, a mission, helping others, kindness and all the other characteristics that make a person memorable.
When we recognize our character, values, mission, honesty, integrity, and how we treat other people outweighs what we see in the mirror, we can often be a lot happier with life, because we are happier with our self!
So I challenge you to take a good look at the person you see in the mirror. Are you struggling to look like the perfect “air-brushed” celebrity on TV? Is the person inside happy with who you’ve become, or is there a need for a little improvement? Do you demonstrate good qualities toward others and yourself? When you can be happy with “you,” accepting yourself for who you are, life is much more pleasant!
Photo Credit: https://www.dreamstime.com/photos-images/genealogy.html
A Walk In The Woods
I read an article about a girl who was left with over 100 stingers on her body after an adventure in the woods. Her friend, Anna, had been instructed by her mother to not go into the woods, but Anna wanted to show her friend a secret path she’d discovered. The girls were excited as they moved forward even as the shadows lengthened and the sun disappeared. At some point Anna’s friend disturbed a ground beehive. The bees swarmed all over her and stung the little girl mercilessly. At the hospital she was told if the bees had stung her any closer to her eyes, she would have been blinded.
Anna, who shared her story was feeling regret, even years later, that she’d disobeyed her mother that day. Her disobedience nearly cost her friend her sight. She certainly meant no harm by entering the woods in her excitement of sharing her secret, yet the consequences of disobedience were huge.
We all have things we regret, even if it is years later. Sometimes the emotion is so deeply buried it takes an unassociated event to reawaken all those hidden feelings. There’s a story about a man who in his mid-thirties is filled with remorse about the way he treated a peer in elementary school with horrible unkindness. He wasn’t at all sure what to do with his feelings since it happened several decades ago. Why would he have such feelings now? He even acknowledge he did not know the reason he was so consumed with this event. Perhaps his life was suddenly changed by a chance meeting with a handicapped person showing him kindness.
Anna, in the above story, was disobedient. Does this disobedience change the way she will handle her own children? According to one source, experiencing regret has an affect on decision making.1 Regrets, in theory, should help us learn something. It can create empathy for someone in a similar situation and cause us to reach out to others. Regrets can also motivate us to think before we make a decision because we want to avoid having regrets.
This doesn’t always work, however! How often have you hit the snooze button on your alarm clock and then sleep through the next alarm? My daughter as a young adult, was notorious for this! She’d then have to rush to get dressed, rush through breakfast (or get something later), speed the whole way to work and hope no police officer saw her and feel frazzled the rest of the day. In theory doing this once should be enough incentive to get up when the alarm went off. Nope! Didn’t happen. This routine seemed more normal than when she did arise on time and leave without having to rush.
As I look back on my own life, there are certainly times I wish I’d done something different than what I’d done. I can’t change those mistakes, however. Apologizing now would make little difference and it’s entirely possible the only one who even remembers the misstep or blunder, is me. It would do no good to bring it up now. But I can be aware of my behaviors and think through my decision making, so regrets are kept at a minimum. I must look forward with a good perspective and try to make someone else’s world good in whatever way I can.
What about you? Do you have regrets from your childhood? Was it from disobedience or just a curious disposition? How does that make you feel? Is there anything you can do about it now? Would you even want to?
1 http://www.pedsforparents.com/general/102945/the-emergence-of-regret-in-childhood/
Photo credit: https://www.123rf.com/photo_5521698_a-hiking-trail-through-the-summer-woods-in-cheesequake-park-located-in-monmouth-county-new-jersey-.html