Crossing The Line To Cruelty
“Kids will be kids,” I remember hearing this when I was younger; but I refuse believe children are naturally cruel. I don’t know whether the behavior is learned or it’s just become part of our ‘modern’ culture to be mean to another person— and here I’m not just talking about kids!
I remember as an elementary student being teased and taunted for being different. My parents moved around a lot and I spent each of my first six years of school in at least one different school. It set my sister and I up for low self-esteem and a level of shyness, that for my sister, was nearly debilitating! It seemed we’d no sooner finally get settled in and we’d move again and have to start all over; meeting new teachers and trying to make new friends. It was a tough time, and I wasn’t even in middle school yet!
Middle schoolers face an even greater threat of bullying, now more than ever. Our society is littered with music filled with hate and often social media platforms which crosses the line of what can be said and shared. Sadly children are sometimes bullied to the point they air their own suicides on line.
To make this even worse, this is the age where our ‘tweens’ seem to shut us out, as parents. They face their trial alone, certain they can handle it, or worse, afraid that should they speak out, the repercussions would be even greater. Our once adorably, cuddly, chatty children are in hiding to everyone, but their peers.
It creates fear, anxiety and tension not only in the child, but also in the parents. We’re wondering what went wrong. How can we help? Why won’t my child talk to me? What did we do to lose their trust? Along with a thousand other questions. Still they say, “Kids will be kids. They’ll work it out.” What happens if they don’t? Bullying seems to beget bullying and it seems no one is safe. And with the existence and accessibility of the internet, the cruelty is ramped up another notch or two. It’s all about being in the right ‘social position’ with just the right ‘friends.’
I’d like to take this idea just a step further, however. No child should ever be bullied. But there is one victim who is even more vulnerable that the “average child who gets bullied!” The Special Needs child is a target at far greater risk. A child with special needs is usually less likely to stand up to his tormentors than even the most shy child. He didn’t choose to not be able to run as fast, or not talk as eloquently as his peers. He didn’t choose to wear a given birth mark, or have Down Syndrome, arthritis, epilepsy, dyslexia, ADHD or autism, cancer or fifty other “special needs” common to our children. Yet these “needs” define him!
And sadly, our society doesn’t always stand up to those who bully. Peers of ‘said bullying,’ are afraid to step in, because they could be the next victim. Rules are in place, but are hard to enforce if the ‘right person’ isn’t a witness. It’s a complicated (and often convoluted system) and it’s time we, as parents, friends, neighbors, and advocates of Special Needs children, to join hearts and hands, abilities and determination to stamp out this cruelty, called ‘bullying.’ Words hurt, and can leave lifetime scars. I hope you’ll attempt to learn more about this, during this month designated “Bullying Awareness Month. It’s time bullying no longer frightened, intimidated, or threatened any child. Let’s make it happen!
#BullyingAwarenessMonth #TimeToStopBullying #BeAnAdvocate #KidsWillBeKids #BullyingIsCruelty
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