Tangled Mind
I searched and searched for the missing document. I knew I had filed it…somewhere! But for the life of me I could not lay my hands on it when I needed it! And then there was the time I couldn’t find the book on the tractor for my husband, or the bill he was sure we’d gotten a week earlier, or the set of keys that were immediately needed.
What makes this situation worse; it seems like when I “lose” something it’s because I deliberately moved it from its previous space, so that when I wanted it I could lay my hands on it in an instant. When the instant comes, I’m at a total loss!
Recently I discovered I’m not the only one who does this. Another friend looked like she was searching everywhere for something and I finally asked her if she lost something. She said “Yes! The title to the trailer we just sold,” she said. “Just tonight I told Elliot I knew right where it was, and now I have no clue what I’ve done with it!”
Like me, because she needed it immediately, her nerves made her mind tangle up in tiny knots making it impossible for her to think clearly. Finally, as she calmed down, she had that “ah ha!” moment and remembered where she put it!
I remember as a student facing a big exam and being horribly concerned about the outcome. It didn’t seem to matter how well I studied, looking at the test caused my brain to freeze. This wasn’t just in elementary, middle or high school! When I went to college as a “non-traditional” student, math class set me in a fit! I studied, did numerous problems over and over again and still when faced with working out the problem without notes, my brain became a tangled, forgetful mess!
There is some consolation in knowing that anxiety does actually cause you to forget things. I say consolation, because apparently it’s a scientific phenomenon. Memory, I discovered, is connected to nutrition and sleep; or that memories, according to some — are created while we sleep! That sounds like an oxymoron to me and I haven’t the faintest idea how that’s possible. But then, I’m not scientific either!
Sometimes, however, I think we forget our manners! We become so focused on ourselves we can’t see past our noses—-or our prejudices! I don’t think it’s always deliberate, but have you noticed how much ‘road rage’ there is on the highways? At the outset, I prefer to think if someone does something unkind, it’s not deliberate. But, retaliation is.
This isn’t the only place bad manners prevail. We see it in our homes, as our lifestyles are changing; in the class rooms, as children become more and more vocal and belligerent against society, and also when in proximity to someone with disabilities. It seems we forget that a disabled person is as much a person as we are. They have as much right to be happy, work, get an education, take care of their families and have a ‘life’ as anyone who is non-disabled. Yet, sometimes our behaviors does not reflect that.
I’d like to think the first time we display bad manners, it’s an oversight. Our minds are ‘tangled’ in our own little world and we are not considering anyone around us, as we try to figure out whatever the battle is going on in our brain. The next time however it’s, in my opinion, deliberate and that is just bad manners.
Thoughts? Please share!
Photo Credit: https://unsplash.com/s/photos/stress