A Loving Relationship Requires Work
Healthy relationships differ from couple to couple, but certainly there are commonalities between all of them. There is usually a balance of power, mutual trust, and open communication. Each partner recognizes and accepts their independence, and have no fear of retribution should a disagreement occur.
A friend described one such couple with some unusual additions. The wife is an outdoors person who loves to canoe and hike trails, while her ‘mans man’ was quiet and commands attention when he speaks. Most people admire him and even seek his advice when they need someone to talk with.
She is busy in many activities within her church, community and school functions with their children. He’s a hard worker and desires to provide for his family.
Each are comfortable on their own, yet when they are apart, there is this sense of ‘feeling’ the other is near by. When in the same room, they often have eye contact with the slightest turn of a smile; and when they pass each other at arm’s length they reach out and touch each others fingers in the most tender way, make almost passionate eye contact, and then continue going wherever it was they were headed. They are individuals yet seem to be one.
This description makes this couple seem ideal and almost a fantasy. While I don’t know this particular couple, I do know a couple who could also be described very closely to this and there are times I feel in awe. While these couples seems so connected, there are certainly times when they disagree, but they work it out.
‘Work’ is the key word. These couples know the value of their partner/spouse and desire to have a beautiful relationship, even when they disagree.
Love is a precious and many miss it. Others, like a person with disabilities, reach for it, but are ridiculed for their choices. There are many in our culture who are convinced a disabled person can’t find true love, which is quite untrue. Each person within the disability community has the same human needs and desires to have a healthy relationship as their non-disabled counterparts.
That said, disabilities or a chronic illness may create unique challenges when dating and developing a special relationship. It isn’t always easy when disabilities are part of the equation. This is true whether both partners are disabled or just one has a disability.
It’s vital that both parties communicate clearly and patiently how they feel about any topic with honesty. Whether verbalizing about physical conditions, emotional situations, caregiver uncertainties, medicines required, needs, expectations, goals, or anything else, regardless how seemingly insignificant, sharing your heart is the only way to keep the communication door open.
Daily stresses have a way of creeping in to distort our thought processes. Being aware of likes and dislikes, sensitivities, and even the need for alone time will help balance day to day life. If you share the bond of love, and want to spend a harmonious life together, expect days that aren’t going to go right. But allow the feelings of mutual love, respect and trust to guide you in the way that will enable your relationship to grow and endure.
Photo Credit: https://www.pexels.com/search/relationship/
Photo Credit: https://www.pexels.com/search/relationships%20with%20disabilities/