The World We Live In
A friend lamented recently on the hate that fills our world. She spoke of the mean and wretched words often spoken by in the political arena, especially during elections! Much of what is said, usually focuses on negative thoughts to anyone who happens to disagree with their view. It seems to be available through social media, news broadcasts, videos, and ultimately culminating in neighbor against neighbor. It can even be affected by perceptions from generation to generation within the multigenerational families or in the disability framework given expectations
On the other side of the podium, she admits she knows there is good in the world, as well. She’s seen the generosity and kind hearts that fill each of our lives, should we choose to acknowledge it; but it feels like we must “fight” to push on through the muck and the mire which crowds out the goodness in people. Instead of shining like a beacon, we’ve become but specks, a quick glimmer in the wind.
I believe, generally speaking, good trounces evil. Perhaps that makes me an eternal optimist with a “Polly Anna attitude.” I’ve been told that before. But that’s okay. I’m of the mindset that good SHOULD crush and defeat the wickedness in our world.
I’ve witnessed kindness this week; kindness I didn’t expect! What strikes me is knowing you can’t always grasp the impact you have on someone else; sometimes on people you don’t even know, no matter what the age.
Most people want kindness, authenticity and truth. It seems it’s difficult to be honest, especially if there is the feeling of failure in the equation. Our society has instilled in us that we should always exude confidence and self-assurance no matter what our circumstance. To demonstrate anything less is weakness.
I understand that mentality, to a point, especially in a business environment. If our productivity is to be the highest possible, increasing the possibility of promotion, it’s important to be strong, compelling and perhaps even formidable in the workplace.
But when you put these same pressures on young people, it can be extremely stressful. It’s part of the “growing-up framework” and it’s likely every teenager deals with these circumstances and feelings. As our “modern” society has evolved, it seems we expect our young ones to deal and project confidence with their peers in the same way we adults are compelled to project conviction and certainty in the workplace. It leaves some vulnerable, and susceptible to a feeling of worthlessness and being inadequate.
One person reminded me recently of the expression, “What doesn’t kill you will make you stronger.” There is truth in that statement, but I wonder about the pressure applied to our youth. This pressure of exuding so much confidence and “being the best” is coming earlier and earlier for our kids. It can be seen even in our elementary schools; even perhaps as early as Kindergarten as more and more is expected from these little people.
It’s good to push our children to do their best, regardless of ability. There should be a balance, however, to allow our kids to just be kids, without having to be “the best.” It’s all part of growing up. Yet as they mature they need to know they need to be themselves, even if they don’t feel like they measure up. They should have our kindness, unconditional love, assurance they are unique; and be reminded they are still priceless in our eyes with our encouragement to accept themselves. And it’s perfectly fine, without apology, to be just who they are!
Being ‘who we are’ is also invaluable if a person is disabled. In the disability spectrum some years back, the expression that someone is ‘retarded’ was changed to someone having an intellectual disability. This was the beginning of changing the verbiage from a condescending format to one of respect, in their world.
With the negativity that swirls in the wind, I encourage you to use kind words to everyone. Our young people need these words, especially, however. They learn what they live and if kindness is given, it’s going to be a whole lot easier to be kind when times around them seem dark.