Alcohol, Babies and Consequences
I read the story recently of a family who adopted an active, but loving little boy just over a year old. They enjoyed his energy and affection until he hit his teen years. Overnight, they said, everything changed. He went from being defender of the weak, to being a bully. He stated, emphatically he would no longer be part of their Christian family, but rather serve from the dark side.
Drugs and alcohol, along with a new set of friends, became his constant companion. The change not only altered their son’s life, but the entire family. As he merged into adulthood, the symptoms continued unabated, causing police action. It wasn’t until he was nearly twenty years old that he was finally diagnosed with fetal alcohol syndrome. With funds depleted, due to expenses of court costs, etc., and trying to help him maintain a semblance of livelihood, his parents were totally drained.
What is so incredibly sad about this whole story is it could have been avoided, had his mother not drank alcohol while she carried him. This is worsened by the knowledge that these kinds of situations occur daily, regardless of medical information telling women who are pregnant, nursing, or even trying to get pregnant not to drink! The damage done to these unborn babies is staggering, and irreversible!
It was interesting that I had a person this week, who was interested in the disability books I write for children if I had any books on children with parents and substance abuse. It begs the question: Why do women who are pregnant drink? In the above case, there wasn’t much data available to pregnant women about drinking when this little boy was carried.
While “do not drink too much” might have been suggested, there wasn’t clear data to prove and urge caution. But as more children display the neurological changes from cells damaged from alcohol, often very early in the pregnancy, although data shows it can happen at any time during the gestation period, clearly alcohol has incredible negative side effects!
Women don’t set out to harm their children, at least not intentionally. Alcoholism is destructive to everyone it touches. Life doesn’t always turn out the way we plan, and those who have a problem coping turn to alcohol to “drown their sorrows.” They don’t realize their “escape” is potentially a devastating poison to their unborn child. Further, trying to get an alcoholic to abstain from drinking while pregnant is nearly impossible. It requires a commitment financially and emotionally many are not willing (or able) to sustain.
Our children are the joy of our lives, yet we put them in danger every time we take a drink of alcohol while we carry them. We harm them in a way that can never be reversed. They can’t heal from it. There is no “magic potion” or medication currently, to change the outcome.
This causes a huge ripple effect. It obviously affects the biological mother, and family. As an adoptive or foster family, the couple find themselves in a situation they hadn’t planned. The unwanted, uncontrollable behavior puts a strain on everything they believed in as parents. It isn’t a parental breakdown however, but the consequence of prenatal alcohol exposure.
It’s easy, as a passerby, to judge a child who is “terrorizing” everyone around him, or having a major meltdown in public. Don’t judge. This may be another child, another victim, of fetal alcohol syndrome. It’s time we get informed and do what we can to curb the tide on this disease that is destroying our children’s brain, one cell at a time. Make a difference today. Get involved. Get educated. Don’t drink if you are pregnant or nursing. Your child’s well-being depends on it!